Sunday, April 15, 2007


Had a nice Sunday... I was a little confused at first.. was this April or November.. it was Freezing cold here... especially this morning.
We got up early and went to watch Steve's Son in a Iron man race.. Run Bike Run... is what they did...As we were on our way there.. we rode with the bicyclists we were in our car .. had to go about 10 miles an hour but it was such a treat to watch this amazing folks battle the frigid weather..watching these bodies evoke such power as they made there way through this competition. These folks were riding into the brisk wind and to just imagine the challenge they were in was something . I even saw a woman who was on the large side.. right in the midst of the race... just pumping away.. that was motivational.. As we waited for Steve's son to come down the finish shoot. I looked at all of the people around me.. and it dawned on me.. I was the biggest person... in the room.. I walked outside and saw that same observation too.. it was a rough feeling.. and very uncomfortable.. All around me were these tiny waists and long limbed people.. men and women.. lean.. perfectly fit bodies.. I watched all ages amble in.. I thought that was interesting but I could not let loose of that one particular feeling .. of being so large.. no one gave me the "look" or anything.. it was all me.. I kept asking myself were does such perfection come from.. what motivates these people to do this.. and then it occured to me.. I really am no different from them.. their's... is the short term race and the long term being fit. Mine is getting healthy.. I never say losing weight is a race.. but perhaps it is .. Sure I have time.. but the sooner the pounds slip away from me.. the healthier my race becomes... the better my body moves.. The reality is .. that no matter what I want to achieve I will never be 5 foot 6 with a tiny waist.. I am 4 ft 11 inches tall.. and by the grace of GOD and my strong will I will weigh 132 pounds.. I will reach that finish line.. I will be healthy and work my way to being as fit as I can. We are all different... Each of us in our own seperate way.. Yet we are all brothers and sisters as we find paths along this journey called life.. a Healthier life...
Wish me well
Wish you well too...


buddha_girl said...

You can do it,Honi! You have it in you to triumph over this damn weight thing.

Even with all the pounds I've banished, I still feel like the fat chick many times each week. That's a work in progress.

The main thing is that like you, I've made the decision to take better care of myself. THAT is a huge step in life!

Coco said...

Unbelievable . . . I've been a non-blogger for less than a year, and I've forgotten basic blogging manners! Where did I leave a response-comment for you? On MY blog, of course!

I so completely understand that feeling you describe. It reminds me of the time I lived in Germany with my tall/slim/fit boyfriend, and we hung out with all his tall/slim/fit/uber-healthy friends. I felt, at a chubby 5'0", like an anomaly of nature! Even now at my new job, which I love, there at two women 'concerned' about their weight, eating copious amounts of seaweed, etc. They are each 5'7" and weigh 130 pounds . . . about as much as my legs . . . so, ya know, I kinda feel like freak around them, like "wow, you must think I'M gross!!!" Then I try to remember it's their own issue, and they're really not thinking about me at all. I'm the only one who needs to do that,as you realized yesterday. Rock on, Honi!!!