WOW .. I was a bit humbled this morning and felt badly.. Steve mentioned to me that sometimes I am a bit hostile to folks. Not that I am overtly mean or anything but that when they mention going to a certain restaurant I tend to get a little stiff.. Usually the place would be somewhere that my choices are limited . While everyone sits there and eats whatever they want I have to calculate and figure out things... and really search the menu.. well to me that is not a fun dining experience .. while I may enjoy the company.. I did not enjoy being stressed out because the only thing I was able to choose was a plain salad.. because everything else was cooked in fat or fried... but I am suppose to be a trooper I guess and just roll with things...He said I need to understand that lots of folks are not trying to do anything about their weight and that I might make them feel bad because I am . He also said something that really struck a nerve.. He said.. and perhaps they do not BELIEVE in you.. after all.. how many times have you tried to lose weight and not succeeded??? how many times have people seen you monitoring yourself.. and nothing comes of it???? ouch.. that still stings.. and he is right.. that is the truth.. Why should anyone believe in me... Lets call it what it is... At the new place I am going no one knows what I did.. everyone is NEW so they are all on my side.. and happy for me.. You guys out there that read this.. You do not know me.. or how many failures I have had.. so of course you cheer me on... but the ones that KNOW KNOW me.. well.. Steve is right.. why on earth should they believe in me... I then asked him if he believed in me.. ??? and he said YES.. because he is seeing the results.. he sees the changes.. and my determination... I told him. that this is not easy that this is a struggle.. and I am only 3 months into this.. so I am not comfortable in all eating situations yet. A lot I choose to avoid for now. There are places to eat that I feel really comfortable in ..Subway, Whole Foods Bistro area... a couple of Asian places... I still obviously have a very long way to go in making these ever changing changes.. I guess that is what I have to remember that my lifestyle changes will be about adapting myself to all situations not just those I am comfortable with.
Wish me well
Wish you well too...
Friday, April 27, 2007
SOMETIMES THE TRUTH IS HARD TO HEAR
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5 comments:
When I'm trying to loss weight I avoid parties, restaurants - any social gathering because I just can't stay on track with all of the temptations. I think its smart to avoid places that you know will just set you back. Your post reminded me of my husband "teasing" me that I'm going on another diet that I just won't stick too - it sure does sting. Sounds like you took it much better than I do :)
Great blog.... lots of luck!
Are you actually YELLING at anyone while out for dinner? If not, I think you've got the frustration/hostility thing well under control. I think it's amazing that you handle that kind of situation as terrifically as you do! I can't even handle sticking to any program (mine or other) even when no one's 'looking' (yet). And the weight you've already lost? You rock, baby! (BTW, I just got the book you mentioned . . . SECRETS OF THE LEAN . . . & am looking forward to reading, & learning. And . . . will be sending you a note tomorrow. Thanks for being there!)
I know what you mean about trying to find some place to eat and sometimes no one understands - it's tough. I have a small list and I insist on sticking to it. Panera's has a great new salmon salad (only 352 calores) so you might want to add that to your list too. Try packing some things with you when you visit others - my family and friends know I mean business - I take vegetables sticks, protein bar, diet soda, water, apples, hard boiled eggs - or whatever I need where ever I go. I reassure folks I love them and I want to hang out - but I can not and will NOT indulge in food that is not on my list.
Hang in there! Give out lots of hugs and thanks you for their support (even when it feels like they are not giving it) and in time they will see you are serious and not get upset with you for an occasional outburst.
I'm here for you! I'm in the same situation. This time we are going to do it!!!!
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