FAMILY FROM OUR WEDDING

Monday, May 12, 2008

WHAT DOCTORS SHOULD NOT SAY TO A FAT PATIENT

Originally I was going to make this a bit humorous but after doing some research well I will let this essay speak for itself PART 1: FAT HATRED KILLS
PART 2 : FAT HATRED KILLS ..
I am still not quiet sure if being angry at the doctor because of her Mother's death is the right placement of that anger.. The whole things was of sad.. her mom just wanted to live quietly and the shame that can accompany obesity is one of the worst feelings in the world.
I dread going to the doctor and getting on the scale.. I have dreaded it all my life and will dread it no matter how small I am or how large I am.
I wonder about the doctor that says to a fat patient.. .. do you realize you are obese? and my first thought.. is .. No really? I would never have known that with out your asshatability to enlighten me. Instead of simply treating the obese patient as a normal person who is large.. the doctor in some cases treats the patient as if they have a mental deficit.
So here is my note to the doctor:
DOCTOR,
One of the most important things you MUST DO is treat me with RESPECT , the respect that I treat you with , simply because you are human.
Trust me on this doctors.. Patients know if they are over weight or not.. People know their size . Talk to me about why I am there.. Talk to me about things pertaining to whatever issue I am having.. if you feel the need to remind me that by losing weight I would feel much better.. chances are I know this.. Because I am a capable adult if I want your advice about weight loss .. I will ask you .. no prompting needed. I am obese , I know this about myself.. your reminding me is a waste of time. If we discuss weight.. listen to me.. if I tell you my knees hurt.. and we both know it is due to my obesity.. thats a good time to discuss .. ~You know if you lose weight consider this, that just by losing 1 pound of fat you are releasing nearly 4 pounds of pressure on your knees.~. Telling me not to walk up steps when I have told you that my house has steps is a waste of time. Read me .. look at my body language.. do I feel uncomfortable with you.. or do I look you in the eye and listen to what you have to say to me. If you know.. and most people know when someone is uncomfortable.. Help me to feel more comfortable.. Don't stare at me with disapproving eyes. Don't tell me not to come see you again unless I lose 50 or however many pounds. Your job is not to judge me but to help me be as healthy as I can be regardless of my weight.. You are not GOD.. though some patients may worship you.. I do not .. you are a man or woman with a medical degree and I am paying you to help me.. not judge me. I realize you get aggravated when you know a patient is non compliant. .. why not talk to that patient . .. if my non compliancy is making things worse for me.. tell me.. tell me that you can not help me unless I help myself if need be. Just do not look at me like I disgust you.. I am the same as you only larger and with out the medical degree. We are all people.. all with flaws of different degrees. We are all people with our own addictions.. or indulgences . Talk to me.. don't talk to my fat.
Most Sincerely,
A Patient.
Wish me well
Wish you well too

4 comments:

Felicia said...

Dealing with the medical community was one of the MAJOR reasons I had WLS. I had horrible trouble getting good care especially once I got pregnant ( yes at 300+ lbs ). So much so that I had complications that were ignored and well lets just say luckily it all worked out.

My weight used to keep me for years from going to the doctor for any kind of treatment. I knew I would be treated unfairly as everything (when your fat) always seems to be blamed on your weight and no further look is often taken.

Obese people do not fit anywhere in the medical community. I couldn't wear the gowns, I didn't fit on the tables, I couldn't fit into the equipment and the list goes on.

What always amazed me was a lot of the doctors that have the worst things to say could stand to lose a few pounds their selves.

Obese patients are the ones they should be paying the most attention to. Instead the pay the least. It makes no sense to me at all.

Great post!
*huggles*
=0)

buddha_girl said...

Before I had my surgery, I was miserable and LOATHED going to the doctor. I happened upon a PA who was AMAZING. She and her nurse made me feel completely comfortable and never gave me the impression that they judged me based on my weight.

I ended up feeling so free with her that I was the one who broached the surgery concept. She jumped through MANY hoops for me to make it happen.

I owe her and her nurse my life. I would definitely be dead today had they not instilled such trust and acceptance in me.

Lora said...

Sounds like you need a new doctor! Last time I visited my OBGYN - she said... "I'd like to see you lose a little weight. You're getting to the point where it can start impacting your health." Then we sat down and discussed ways I could achieve that. She told that she understood how hard it can be. That she herself struggles too. And she told me some of the benefits to my body if I lost even 10% of my weight. She's a great Doctor! I didn't feel bad when I left her office. Just motivated to drop some weight and thankful that she was honest enough to tell me. My primary car Dr. never says a word. Maybe he's embarrassed!

Twix said...

Ooooo, I like this!! Wonderful, wonderful! Totally like it!!! :D