Tuesday, July 8, 2008


ODDLY ENOUGH I WAS WEIGHED.. I HAVE LOST 10 POUNDS IN 2 MONTHS. I AM OFFICIALLY 182.00 Not any of that other crap as of late.. My scale makes me weigh 6 pounds more than I do. Steve wants me to send the scale back if it is that far off and can not be recalabrated. I weighed 182 at 4pm and fully clothed minus shoes at the doctors office yesterday and at 530 pm I weighed 188.5 at my house.. HELFUKINNO... lol.. something is wrong... so I go see the doctor the first week in September.. I might not weigh again until then .. or I might just use this scale and monitor myself from time to time.. this truely shows me how absurd the scale can be.. My doc high fived me for the weight loss lol... okay next on the agenda..
Migraine news.. he put me on a disolvable pill i place on my tongue the minute an aura starts.. it should abort the migraine .. in 70% of the people it helps .. in 30% it does not help.. so we shall see when or if i have another headache... he also changed my BCP back to the orginal.. I was taking Apri originally and then was switched to RECLIPSIN.. now I am back on Apri yay..

One week from today mom is having her open heart surgery... One week that is turning out to be massively difficult. Everyone is a target of her rath .. Nothing is being done right and her children do not love her ... She does not need anyone we are all hateful yada yada.. its what i hear every single day as of late.. if its not me its one of my 2 other sisters. Someone is doing her wrong.. She is going to die next week and no one believes that... Fact.. she is out of control.. fact she has no control .. fact she HATES not having control.. I do understand how she feels she is scared.. not sure if she really will be here next week.. not sure what will happen.. and her daughters are not doing things the way she thinks they should.. and it simply is not nor never will be good enough.. My mom comes from a world where she grew up not having much in the 30s and 40s.. then she meets my dad.. he treats her like a princess and spoils her rotten.. she works.. some.. a few jewelry stores.. for my dad in his furniture stores.. she helped some.. but mostly she could do what she wanted.. she had a house keeper 5 days a week that pretty much raised me from the time I was 3.. the older sisters where in grammar school and then jr high and high school and then had a good married predictable life.. my older sister had a similiar life.. not having to work unless she wanted too.. but not having to make ends meet.. like my middle sister and myself. consequently they do not understand the responsibility of having a job.. My mother thinks its horrible that I will not be at the hospital on Monday when she has her artiergram.. but my sisters will be there and they can handle it and handle the visit with the doctor.. I have to work on monday and will be there after work.. of course I am still an evil daughter.. oh well .. not much I can do about that.. except do what I can . I just want to come through this for myself and her as best I can.. and be the best daughter wether right or wrong in her eyes.. .. sigh..
and so it goes..
Wish me well
Wish you well too


Chubby Chick said...

Congrats on the weight loss! That is awesome!

I hope the new migraine pills help!

You are NOT an evil daughter. You are a wonderful daughter, and just try to not let your mom's attitude get you down. I know that's easier said than done though... and I sincerely hope that everything turns out well next week. Hang in there! :)

JC said...

Hey Honi, Just coming by to visit a spell. You are not a bad daughter but your mom is stressing big time. I would be to if I were in her shoes. I hope the new pill for migraines works for you. I don't have any experience in that area.

Congrats on the weight loss. My scales weight 5 lbs more than the Weight Watcher scales so I set them back. They are the old fashion kind.

The receipes sound great. I'll have to try them when I get back. Just as you are going through this ordeal with your mom next Tuesday. I leave for Israel next Tuesday.

Hang in there my new blog buddy. JC

Cammy said...

Well done on the weight loss.

I'm glad you see where your mother's actions are coming from and not taking it out on yourself. You're doing the best you can and it's enough!

Laura said...

Honi, what an awesome job losing the weight!!! I am so proud for you. Hope the med for the migraines work. And as far as your mom goes....all we can do is the best we can do. You do that and you can lay your pillow on your head at night knowing you did your best and were that best daughter you could be.

Twix said...

Hope the new pill works! Migraines are no fun. Sorry to hear about your mom. Losing control is no fun and scary. And hooray on weighing less at the doctors. It's always a cool thing when we weigh less there! I agree ship that scale back to Mars!! :D Wishing today (wednesday)is fantastic for you!

cadbury_vw said...

lord i hope your new migraine pills work!

i feel terrible for yyou that your mother is unloading all her fear onto you and the others

be the best daughter you can be in your eyes - not hers

because you will never measure up there - set your own criteria for good daughterdom and meet it

here's hopin'...

cadbury_vw said...

oh - almost missed saying - good on you for your weight

i admire your dedication